Treacherous Heart
by Amanda Hawthorn
Summary: The sincerity of his words, and the sadness with which he spoke them, tore down every one of the barriers that she'd taken so long to build. How was it that this man could disable her defences with only one word? Based on 7x04


**Disclaimer: Burn Notice still doesn't belong to me unfortunately!**

**A/N: Thank you to everyone who has reviewed my previous stories. I really do appreciate all of your comments.**

**Special thanks to my friends JediSkysinger and Purdy's Pal for reading through this for me. Extra thanks to JediSkysinger not only for her swift BETA but also for giving us UK girls a much needed tissue alert before we watched the new episode! We definitely needed it!**

**Lastly thanks to DaisyDay, Noelle and all the girls on twitter**

**This story is based on 7x04**

_**The sincerity of his words, and the sadness with which he spoke them, tore down every one of the barriers that she'd taken so long to build. How was it that this man could disable her defences with only one word?**_

Treacherous Heart

His voice brought back every single emotion that she had attempted to bury inside her, pushing them right back to the surface again. The sincerity of his words, and the sadness with which he spoke them, tore down every one of the barriers that she'd taken so long to build. How was it that this man could disable her defences with only one word? Shaking her head, she opened her mouth to tell him that she couldn't help him when his soft voice broke right through her walls.

"_I'm sorry…" _

His voice quivered slightly as he spoke and Fiona fought with every ounce of resolve she had to banish the love that still burned for him. But she was finding that particular task one of the hardest things she'd ever tried to do. She had loved him for so long that she had no idea how _not_ to love him. She had _almost_ succeeded in banishing him... but almost just wasn't enough.

"I can't drop everything for you," she told him firmly, even though she could already feel her heart betraying her. "Not anymore."

"_Fi—"_

"Look," she started, intent on cutting him off. But the second she heard the slight tremor in his voice, the words died on her lips. Her movements came to a standstill as she once again fought to hear him over the thumping of her heart. Why did she let him do this to her?

"_Let me finish…please…"_

Fiona swallowed hard and nodded her head, even though he couldn't see her. She didn't even realize that she was holding her breath until she heard his next words and suddenly she was transported right back to Panama, reliving the words that she'd had no idea would only serve to break her apart.

"_I know I made a promise… that everything was going to change…and I broke that promise…"_

Tears swam in Fiona's eyes, but she blinked them away before they could tumble over onto her cheeks. She had already cried so many tears and, even though the new man in her life had a lot of the qualities she wanted, deep down inside she knew that he would never be her everything because_… he..._ wasn't… Michael. Taking a breath, her eyes blurred with emotion as she clutched her phone tighter against her ear.

"_You deserve better…"_

Fiona dared not speak for fear of revealing just how much she still loved him. He had a power over her that had always kept her bound to him and she knew, no matter how hard she tried, that the bond between them could never be broken. She heard him stumble over his own words, the sound causing her heart to ache and her eyes to flood. Stepping away from him had been the hardest thing she'd ever had to do… and even after nine months, it still hurt.

"_I'm… happy that you have that now…"_

Fiona's body trembled and she cursed her treacherous emotions for rendering her powerless to fight against the love she'd attempted to bury. She still burned for him. She'd always known it, but she just wished that she could just… stop.

"What do you need?" she asked, the words spilling from her lips before she could stop them. She told herself that this was just one time; one last chance to help the man who had held her heart in his hand for so many, many years.

She wrote as he spoke, all the while trying not to love him…trying not to miss him. With every word she scribbled onto the paper, there was a tear to match each one. Every tear cast a burning ache deep inside her as her love for this man wound its way around her heart. She could hear his pain reverberating through every word he spoke, something that she hadn't heard from him since he'd visited her in prison for the first time. She knew that he'd loved her back then and, up until now, she'd refused to believe that his feelings for her were still as strong. But she could hear it in his voice, scorching through every single syllable… and it _hurt _so _damn_ much…

When he hung up after bidding her a soft goodbye, she sank back into her chair, dazed and trying to figure out just how she was going to hide this from Carlos. She couldn't tell him that she was doing this for Michael because he just wouldn't understand… and how could she blame him when she didn't understand this herself? He loved her, he made her feel special and sometimes he even made her forget… but never completely.

Glancing down at her scribbled words, she blinked at the wetness that still blurred her vision before she found her gaze settling onto the two remaining snow globes that she'd managed to take with her after they'd torched the loft. They were a reminder… _no_… they were a _link_… something to tie her to Michael in a way that only the two of them would ever know.

Carlos knew all about her relationship with Michael and how he'd broken her heart so many times. But what he didn't know was that her love for Michael was so strong that it had stayed with her for as long as she could remember. He was her first true love… her _only_ true love…and it was going to take longer than she'd thought to try and get over him.

Reaching out to the candles that she'd lit only a short time ago, she traced her fingertip over the wax drip that had hardened in a perfect tear shape at the base. Her current boyfriend was supposed to be coming over for a romantic dinner, but how could she be romantic now when her heart was still craving for her lost lover.

Getting to her feet, she swiped at the wetness on her cheeks and bent to blow out the orange flame that danced atop the white candle. Maybe she could move on for real this time after she'd finished this job. She'd help him one more time, just once… and then she could really move on…

The End


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